Tiffany Turley Bowcut ON: Divorce, Sexual Assault, Suicidal Thoughts, Looking to God in Darkness, Trusting in God's trust in you, Helpers that show up in our darkness, Service and Healing.

Tiffany Turley Bowcut grew up in a wonderful home with parents that gave her all of the tools to excel in whatever she determined to do. When she moved to College at BYU she wanted to get married and have children as soon as possible and truly looked forward to finding a great man to marry and be a mother to kids.

 

At 19 Tiffany was married and a short time after that she learned of her husbands addiction to pornography which led to infidelity and shattered trust. After her divorce, Tiffany relied on family and close associates to help her hold onto hope and continue forward. Trust was ripped away from Tiffany and as she worked to rebuild it she had help along the way.  A short time later as she had rebuilt some of that trust, a colleague Sexually Assaulted (Raped) her and like most cases of Sexual Assault/Rape, it was by a man that Tiffany thought she knew and could trust. At this point her whole world turned upside down and her Trust in others was destroyed.

 

She began to have suicidal thoughts and feelings and thought that she had no value to anyone which led to some very dark times. Feeling alone, lost, and without hope, Tiffany was thinking through suicide and was impressed to think about what it would do to her family if she went through with it. She had the thought that she needed to visit her grandparents and although she didn't know why she should, she decided that she needed to act on that thought. During her visit to her grandparents home, her grandfather did something not typical for a grandparent who is talking to a grandchild who is having thoughts of Suicide. Rather than telling Tiffany all of the wonderful things about herself that family members say, Grandpa talked about the difficulties that her ancestors faced, and of the amazing faith, strength, and courage they held onto to make it through their own hopeless times. That gave Tiffany Hope and helped her reconnect with the strength that she had within. 

 

In her Darkest moments Tiffany teaches us how she was able to hold on, and how she approached God. She shares a beautiful and tender moment she had when she was in a lot of pain, she envisioned herself with God before her life on earth having a conversation about coming down to this earth to live away from Him. She envisioned God telling her it will not be easy, and in fact it will be hard, but I know that you can do it. She then pictured herself responding that she would go to earth and although she knew it would be hard, she knew that because her Heavenly Father trusted her to go, she could trust in Him knowing that she could do it. This tender experience helped Tiffany rise up and move forward. She had renewed faith in herself and knew that she could have a beautiful life, if she could just trust God and move forward no matter how small the steps were. 

 

The gift Tiffany received in her darkest hours was the gift of recognizing her infinite worth, and divine nature. She now understands how God feels about her and knows that God believes in her so she can trust in His belief in her and the work He is actively doing in Tiffany's life to help her along the way.  Now years later Tiffany is happily married to a wonderful man, and they have 3 young children. Tiffany's life is devoted to them and to giving back to women as she has worked in the Women's Center at Brigham Young University (BYU), and now oversees the Sexual Assault, Stalking, and Domestic Violence division.

 

Tiffany has so much knowledge and wisdom to share on these subjects, listening to her tell her story will help give parents ideas of how they can better prepare their children for when they leave the home.  If you or anyone you know is struggling as a result of Sexual Assault, Stalking, Domestic Violence, or if you are a parent and have questions about how to better prepare your children, feel free to reach out to Tiffany at tiffturley@gmail.com. Tiffany, you are amazing!